Being together is EVERYTHING
Family is important. They are the very first people we know in this world and they are our first priority. No matter what era we live in, we always find time to come togehter. No matter what age we are, we need a group of people called FAMILY to comfort us. But during the Pol Pot regime, families were torn apart. Old people got to work and live in a unit, while young ones were divided into other units.
Phea Nith knows what a 'sad family' is but for long he was at a loss when it came to defining a "happy family". In a sad and broken voice, he tells us how he misses the family members that he lost during the Khmer Rouge years. He wishes they would come back so he could find peace. But it's a wish that will never come true.
"It's the one wish that will never come true"
During almost four years, from April 1975 until January 1979, the Khmer Rouge regime killed 1.7 to 2.2 million people. Half a million were intentionally murdered and another million were starved or died of illness. Children were taken away from their parents and forced to work in children's brigades....
"I didn't even have a chance to see him."
“If I would be separated from family, I would feel totally desperate and lonely as no one would be able to help me and be there for me. When I was young, I sometimes stayed away from my parents for several days. It was a time when I deeply missed them..."
What if I lost my family?
The one wish that can not come true
The end of the Khmer Rouge regime did not mean it was the end of suffering and loss. The nightmare of those years still haunts the survivors. Children and widows struggled with getting on with life after 1979. People disabled from war injuries or landmines are still a social issue across the country today. Pol Pot, the leader of the Khmer Rouge died in 1998. Others from the regime's leadership were sentenced to life in prison in November 2016.
Phea Nith knew what a “sad family” was but for years he was at a loss when it came to defining a “happy family”. With a sad and heavy voice, he tells us how misses the family members he lost during the Khmer Rouge years and how he wishes he could be reunited with them. But it's a wish that he knows will never come true.
Phea Nith spoke for nearly two hours with us, telling us about his life and suffering under the Khmer Rouge. When Pol Pot lost power in 1979, he still hoped he would be able to find his family members again.
Between 1975 and 1979, his family did not have a specific home or village as the Khmer Rouge soldiers assigned them to different locations across the country.
They moved from Svay Rieng province to Siem Reap province. Like many others, it took his family at least three to four days traveling from one area to another as they had to walk all the way, often more than 100 kilometers, mostly at night. The long hours of walking seriously hurt his feet and he is still suffering from it to this day.
He also tells us how one night, his mother fell into a canal as she was too exhausted and tired. Fortunately, one of his brothers managed to immediately safe her. Phea Nith's daily life during the years that followed was marked by hard work. He was forced to pick up cow and buffalo waste or build fences so they could use the waste to make fertilizer. He lived with a younger brother, a younger sister, his mother and father. His five older brothers and one sister were sent into the forest to become Khmer Rouge soldier. In order to survive, his family members ate whatever they could find, even things like insects. Although the raw insects could be dangerous to their health, they were so hungry that they found them to taste like real delicacies.
Almost every day, he witnessed the death of people because of starvation or because they were tortured. There was not enough food and people were forced to work far beyond their strength and capacity. To feed their family, his father secretly fished at midnight using a mosquito net and brought home fish and crab for them to eat. If the Khmer Rouge would have found out about it, he would have been killed. Everything was supposed to belong to the party, to Angkar, and you were not allowed to get food individually.
His mother had the hope that one day she could again live happily with her family. She decided to walk back to their hometown to maybe meet her other kids there. The walk was long and strenuous and Phea Nith's younger brother and sister were very hungry but there was nothing to eat for days. When there eventually was some food, they ate so much that their stomachs got sick. Both of them passed away on the same day in 1979.
"I didn't even have a chance to see him"
Mrs. Chan Sopheab, 70, is from Svay Reang province. During the Pol Pot years, she was told that her father was seriously sick and wanted her to meet him for the last time. She tried hard to ask the Khmer Rouge cadres for permission but they did not allow here to go. The cadres told her that whether she could meet him or not, her father would still remain sick and she could not help him, so she should just stay still. Later, she tried and searched for her father, but she had no clue where to find him. Not only her father, but also her mother and two siblings had passed away. There was not even a photo of him left for her. The pain and loss of her family is still with her to this very day. But she also learned that she was not alone in her situation, that there are many victims just like here who had suffered similar fates and had been treated the same way as her.
Over the course of almost four years, from April 1975 until January 1979, the Khmer Rouge or Democratic Kampuchea or Pol Pot regime killed 1.7 to 2.2 million people. Half a million were intentionally murdered and another million were starved or forced to work in communes, according to the Cambodian Genocide Project censuses. Children were taken away from their parents and forced to work in children's brigades.
How would I feel if I lost my family during the Khmer Rouge years?
Vyra Dore, 4th year student at university, majoring in Health and Science, from Kompong Thom Province
“If I was separated from my family, I would feel desperate and lonely as no one would be able to help me and be there for me. When I was young, I used to stay far away from my parents for several days - it was a time when I deeply missed them, felt isolated and insecure. If I would have to live under Pol Pot, it would be even more difficult. We know that during the Khmer Rouge regime, people were not only forced to live apart from each other but also had to work terribly hard without having enough food to eat”.
Hean Sao Seyha, 3rd year student majoring in Khmer Literature at Royal University of Phnom Penh, from Kompong Chhnan Province
"Family is like protective shade for kids. As a child, I need comfort, support, and everything from my parents. So I cannot imagine my life living under the Pol Pot regime without them. It would be really hard for me, because I wouldn’t be able to see my family when I miss them, would not be able to eat the food that my family made, and I wouldn't have a proper place to sleep."
Ban Chhorm Sopanha, 1st year student at ITI, Industrial Technical Institute, from Kompong Thom province
“Without my family, I would not be able to study, and I don't know what my life would look like without them. I have four siblings, and we never argue with one another. They are of course the most important people to me after my parents. They encourage me, and I can discuss things with them before we make a decision...
If I had to live under the regime (Khmer Rouge Regime) and was separated from my family, I would be lonely. With the lack of food, I would not be able to work well because I would be very exhausted. More importantly, I could not live without getting motivations from my family members because they are special to me in my life.”
